Tag Archives: Gyaan

Ten Simple Truths … that I constantly need to remind myself

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TRUTH 1 :

So what if you got the world’s best education and have an IQ that is so high that any higher you would not be human? It does not matter unless you get off your butt and use it. Action …. that is the key. Sometimes that is all it boils down to. I know it is really simple, but one needs to be constantly reminded.

TRUTH 2 :

It took me a lot of time to arrive at this conclusion … being successful and being happy don’t mean the same thing. Some people are wildly successful but lonely, irritable and depressed. Some people live on the edge of financial disaster but can be the most positive, lighthearted people. Meena Kumari, cine actress of yesteryears drank herself to death, but people considered her a great success. The boy who cleans my car has a cellphone that blares his favorite music and he sings happily along while he cleans my car. So one needs to constantly ask oneself … Am I successful? Am I happy? And not freak if one gets different answers to the question.

TRUTH 3

There is only one person you work for – yourself. It does not matter if you have a job or own your business. The only time you work is when you feel motivated, and you feel motivated only if you have some personal interest in the work you are doing. So get involved and not simply clock time. You won’t excel unless you do so.

TRUTH 4

Its easy to mess up. Just throw up too many options. Too many options make decision making tough. Keep it simple and you make progress.

TRUTH 5

The choice is yours, you can be a success or a failure. You have the potential to be either of the two.

TRUTH 6

Never confuse vocation and calling. Vocation is what you do to earn money and pay your bills. You may be insanely good at it, even if you hate it. I know … I hate what I do to make a living. It is just a vocation. I am a writer by calling. I love to craft stories, tell tales (the taller, the better). But it does not pay my bills sadly. Hence I stick to my vocation.

TRUTH 7

This is ages old but can do with reminding …. Mistakes are progress. Every mistake teaches you something – even if it is just to be more careful the next time and not make it. So go ahead, mess up a bit. It may be fun, if may be horrible .. but it is better than sitting on your butt doing nothing.

TRUTH 8

If you hate someone, or dislike someone, it is your problem, not theirs. You may dislike a trait in the person, or have a bad relationship with the person … whatever. Just stop and think. Does it affect them? No! That person is just fine, the way he or she is. The problem is yours. Deal with it.

TRUTH 9

If you are making a decision in the heat of the moment, stop right there. You may be making a decision based on emotion. Those decisions can really harm you. Take time out, deal with the emotion first. Laugh, cry, rant, fight – whatever. Get it out of your system. Then take your decision. It will definitely be wiser and safer.

This is in italics because I need to learn and relearn this … sigh!

TRUTH 10

Opportunities are there in abundance – but their timings are always off. Grab them by the horns and make the best of them. I have rarely encountered one when I am free or have been wanting one. And most of them push me out of my comfort zone. I have let some of them slip away too, just because I was not ready, only to regret it later. Yes I am quite the mistress of inaction when faced with challenges. I have spent a lifetime learning and re-learning.

Of Learning the Lessons

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“In the natural world you have no friends and you have no enemies. You have only teachers” Dan Millman

I do not think a squirrel would say he hates the cat. He is just going to make tracks asap. A cat will climb curtains and sit on the pelmet rather than try to make polite conversation with the dog all the time plotting how to settle scores. To hate a person, or make friends or try to get on is a human condition. Another burden to carry on our already overburdened shoulders. Hence we have enemies and friends.

When I was much younger, and I was studying for my Jyotish Shastri, we had an instructor who was excellent. In fact his observations of the human condition, our foibles and foolishness gave me much of my gyaan. He would never tell a person that his Shani was bad. He would just say, “Learn, since Shani is a great teacher, very patient. If you fail class, he is just going to keep sitting there until you pass out”. I found that amazingly positive.

I went into marriage a cocksure arrogant bitch. I knew I was perfect, smart, intelligent and witty. It is at that time I realized that Ex came into my life as a teacher, not an enemy. He came to teach me ……..

I often wondered what he came to teach me.

One day I was sitting on the terrace and watching Kid#1 practising Tae Kwondo kicks on the wall. He would over-reach, kick and fall on the hard roof. Then he would pick himself up and have another go at it……

Kid#2 would be sitting next to me with all the keys that he could lay his tiny little hands on. He would line them up and try each and every one of them on all the sundry locks that he had collected through ages…….

Both headstrong, both stubborn and both tenacious….

Genetics is a pretty powerful thing. Both have a very similar character trait to mine. I could recognize kindred spirits.  I realized ex had come in my life to teach to teach me that I was unteachable. I thought I knew it all and
didn’t need to learn anything. Boy, did he prove me wrong! When he got done I had the stuffing knocked out of me, was finally looking for answers.

Hey B!!! This is in reply to your exasperated question : Kis mitti ki banee ho? Itni khush kaise ho?

All that I have in my life, all that I have achieved has come true because of that one experience in my life! So you see, there are no enemies …. there are no curses …

There are only teachers.