Font "Warp 1" was not found.Pam Ayres: Poetess with a sense of humor

Oh, I Wish I’d Looked After Me Tits

By Pam Ayres

Oh, I wish I’d looked after me dear old knockers,

Not flashed them to boys behind the school lockers,

Or let them get fondled by randy old dockers,

Oh, I wish I’d looked after me tits.

‘Cos now I’m much older and gravity’s winning.

It’s Nature’s revenge for all that sinning,

And those dirty memories are rapidly dimming,

Oh, I wish I’d looked after me tits

‘Cos tits can be such troublesome things

When they no longer bounce, but dangle and swing.

And although they go well with my Bingo wings,

I wish I’d looked after me tits.

When they’re both long enough to tie up in a bow,

When it’s not the sweet chariot that swings low,

When they’re less of a friend and more of a foe,

Then I wish I’d looked after me tits.

When I was young I got whistles and hoots,

From the men on the site to the men in the suits,

Now me nipples get stuck in the zips on me boots,

Oh, I wish I’d looked after me tits

When I was younger I rode bikes and scooters,

Cruising around with my favourite suitors.

Now the wheels get entangled with my dangling hooters,

I wish I’d looked after me tits.

When they follow behind and get trapped in the door,

When they’re less in the air and more near the floor,

When people see less of them rather than more,

Oh, I wish I’d looked after me tits

I wish I had written this one!!!



June 26, 2009 ·

Font "Warp 1" was not found.Comments

14 Responses to “Pam Ayres: Poetess with a sense of humor”

  1. Rohini on June 26th, 2009 5:34 am

    LOL! Thanks for the much-needed guffaw :D

    Yeah she has a lot of talent

  2. Freya on June 26th, 2009 8:45 am

    man, that was too funny!

    It is

  3. hitchwriter on June 26th, 2009 10:44 am

    he he he… i m loving this… lets read again… !!!!

    LOL Enjoy Hitchy

  4. Pearls on June 26th, 2009 12:14 pm

    Awesome!!!!
    Loved it

  5. Rajat on June 26th, 2009 12:56 pm

    That was some Real Fun!!

  6. Sindhu on June 26th, 2009 3:10 pm

    that was hilarious! Will have to sing that poem soon!

    Yeah set it to some dhinchak music

  7. Sands on June 26th, 2009 3:14 pm

    Hilarious. Thanks for the friday humor :)

  8. SMM on June 27th, 2009 5:08 am

    OKay i’m going to tart looking after my tits and my knowckers…I don’t want my nipples getting stuck in the zip of my boot :P

    Gravity does strange things to tits when you grow older

  9. Indyeah on June 27th, 2009 6:04 am

    :lol: :lol:

  10. Indian Homemaker on June 27th, 2009 12:47 pm

    ROTFL :lol:

    Awesome isnt it?

  11. Advitiya on June 29th, 2009 5:04 am

    Hehehehe… A brilliant way to start moanday! :D

    Awesome poem isnt it

  12. pinku on June 29th, 2009 11:56 am

    beautiful….and salutes to the lady for saying the truth and saying it with so much panache…

    I loved it too

  13. sakhi on July 6th, 2009 10:44 am

    :D :D hilarious!!! :D :D

    Awesome talent isnt it! Wish I had written it

  14. nana5270 on September 26th, 2009 9:20 pm

    Very funny now if I could send it

Leave a Reply